Saturday, February 28, 2009

Movie Reviews: It's Scary Because It Totally Happened For Real

[REC] (2007) **Hecho en EspaƱa**
Directors: Jaume Balaguero and Paco Plaza
Writers: Jaume Balaguero, Luis Berdejo, and Paco Plaza
Starring: a bunch of Spanish actors you've never heard of

vs.

Quarantine (2008) **Made in the U.S.A.!**
Director: John Erick Dowdle
Writers: John Erick Dowdle and Drew Dowdle (and the Spanish guys)

Starring:
Jennifer Carpenter (from Dexter, I've never seen the show)
Greg Germann (TV actor, used to be on Ally McBeal)
Rade Serbedzija (all-purpose seedy Eastern European)



Horror, more than most genres, depends on the audience's suspension of disbelief. If viewers don't believe in the monster, if they're not invested in the characters, then no amount of clever editing or special effects will scare them. To draw viewers into their reality, horror films have constantly searched for new methods of creating verisimilitude, whether it be realistic gore, naturalistic dialogue, or by exploiting real-life tragedies. In the age of Youtube and cell phone cameras, the obvious next step was the use of "amateur" footage. Even when dealing with absurd ideas like zombies or monsters, the qualities that define amateur video - grainy visuals, shakiness, the complete lack of editing - create the illusion of "real" in a way that even the most jaded Youtuber can get sucked into.

The first film to embrace the amateur footage conceit wholeheartedly was The Blair Witch Project, all the way back in 1999. Despite the film's phenomenal success, it took a surprisingly long time for imitators to emerge. Even the sequel eschewed the amateur documentary style in preference for a more traditional narrative format. But over the past two years, there's been a slow but steady trickle of horror films that maintain the pretense of being amateur videos. For example, George Romero's Diary of the Dead is yet another sequel in his zombie franchise, but it is the first to be "recorded" by characters actually trapped in a zombie apocalypse. And the nausea-inducing Cloverfield tapped into our collective memories of 9/11 while an amateur cameraman filmed a giant monster destroying New York City.

With the stage set, enter the Spanish. For a country with a tiny film industry, Spain has produced a large number of excellent horror films. So perhaps it's not surprising that Spanish filmmakers would revive the Blair Witch gimick and make a movie that's actually scary. [REC] is, of course, a reference to the 'record' function of a video camera, and the film pretends to be an unscripted recording by a cameraman for a TV program that covers nighttime jobs. The unseen cameraman is named Pablo, which is rather amusing considering that the actual cinematographer is Pablo Rosso, who I guess plays himself. He and the show's attractive host, Angela (played by Manuela Velasco), follow a pair of firemen as they respond to an emergency at an apartment. Apparently, an old woman is screaming and scaring the hell out of her neighbors. Unfortunately for Angela and Pablo, the old woman isn't just crazy; she's infected with a terrible disease that's turned her into a rabid killer, and one bite is all it takes to pass it on to another. Even more unfortunate for the duo, the Spanish government decides to deal with the problem by sealing off the entire building and trapping them inside.

Having apparently milked Japanese horror for all its worth, Hollywood turned to Spain, and [REC] got remade with a bigger budget and a better looking cast. The American version is, however, remarkably faithful to its source. It retains the "real" video conceit, using several tricks such as shaky camerawork and hiding the edits through abrupt interruptions in the video. The plot is also basically the same, and several scenes from the Spanish original are copied in perfect detail.

There are differences between the two versions, and most favor the Spanish. Hollywood films always have a certain glitz and polish to them, no matter how "realistic" they're supposed to be. This isn't always a problem, but when a movie is pretending to be actual amateur footage, the illusion quickly breaks down when the hot Latina from Heroes shows up. The American version also can't resist standard horror lighting, where everything is dark except for some convenient illumination around the actors. The Spanish original stuck to light sources that would actually be available to the characters, so everything and everyone kind of looks like crap (though the need for lighting leads to one bizarre foul-up, where we clearly see the light of day coming through some windows in a story that's supposed to take place entirely at night!). Also, [REC] is a much leaner movie, at less than an hour and a half. My favorite bit from the Spanish version, however, is that the cameraman never appears on camera (except for his shoes). The Pablo "character" is little more than a voyeur with just enough courage to walk down a dark hall: in effect, he's the avatar for the viewer, and this effectively makes the viewer a character in the film. The American version fouls this up completely, and turns the cameraman into just another whiny jerk trapped in the apartment building.

If you don't suffer from motion sickness and you're looking for a decent scare, give [REC] a try. It's a well-crafted little flick and it's worth it to put up with subtitles. But if you're the type who really hates to read, then I suppose you could do worse than Quarantine.

Friday, February 27, 2009

Comics Reading List

Rex Mundi v.2 #16 (Dark Horse)
Writer: Arvid Nelson
Artist: Juan Ferreyra

To make one thing clear up front, this is not a jumping in point, especially considering that the book is ending in a couple issues. But for those who've been following Rex Mundi since back in the day when it was still at Image, there's quite a bit of plot progression, and multiple surprise deaths. Apparently, the solicitations stupidly gave one of them away, but this book still packs its fair share of "holy shit!" moments. The last few pages left me wondering how the Duke of Lorraine will be stopped absent God Himself intervening.

Ferreyra's art is fairly typical for mainstream American comics, but he does very nice facial expressions, and the colors seem to enhance the pencil work rather than muddle it.

Hack/Slash #20 (Devil's Due Publishing)
Writer: Tim Seeley
Artist: Kevin Mellon

Another title that merits a warning that this is not a jumping in point. Seeley continues to explore several ongoing subplots, including the relationship tensions between Cassie, Georgia, and Vlad. Cassie also faces trouble with the law, because she's been wrongly accused of murdering multiple slasher victims, thanks to the machinations of a certain slasher who can manipulate people's dreams. This issue also introduces a new group of villains known as the Black Lamp Society. Altogether a busy issue that sets up some interesting new directions for the comic.

But there is one big problem with this book: Mellon's artwork is simply terrible. Ugly faces, unappealing cheesecake, confusing layouts, washed-out colors. The writing in a comic should never have to struggle to rise above the art. The wildly uneven quality of the art from one issue to the next has been a major drawback of this title.

Dynamo 5 #20 (Image)
Writer: Jay Faerber
Artist: Mahmud A. Asrar

This issue works well as one of those filler stories where the superhero team takes some downtime while the writer sets up future plotlines. However, Faerber is savvy enough to throw in a some nice character moments and plenty of action. Visionary, the youngest member of the team, gets a date with the cute heroine Firebird, while the other team members are either re-settling or dealing with their own romantic problems. In the B-plot, a ditzy super-villain couple gets into a lover's spat that tears up downtown Tower City, and Dynamo 5 intervenes. In yet another plot, an old enemy of team (but not that old, since the team hasn't exactly been around that long) is ready to get some payback. None of this is going to revolutionize comics or the superhero genre, but Dynamo 5 remains consistently solid entertainment, and that's all too rare in the comics industry.

Asrar's traditional, superheroic art goes well with Faerber's scripts, and he adds some nice touches like amusing facial expressions and cheesecake that's actually fun to look at.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Achievement Addiction

My functioning (for the time being) Xbox 360 turned me into an achievement junkie. I kept telling myself I didn't have a problem. But when I looked back and realized that I'd spent most of the weekend buying fake real estate in a fake universe solely to get another achievement in Fables 2, I felt dirty. I'm gonna quit now, before this thing takes over my life ... or at least until the additional content for Fallout 3 comes out. Then I can level up and get that achievement for killing all the super mutant behemoths. Just one last fix, then I'll stop. I swear.

I Hope the Movie Doesn't Suck...

Scott Pilgrim vs. the Universe (Oni)
Writer/Artist: Bryan Lee O'Malley

There's a certain futility in reviewing the fifth book in a series of six. Presumably, everyone has already made up their mind as to whether or not they like Scott Pilgrim and its mix of action, melodrama, and liberal references to Claremont era X-Men and 80's video games. While it's a bit much to call it a zeitgeist comic, it unquestionably captures the spirit of the ascendant geek culture, and you're either part of that culture or you're not.

Setting all the in-crowd stuff aside, this is the best book yet in an already outstanding series. As usual, Scott must do battle with Ramona's evil ex-boyfriends (twins, this time), but the real action involves how the core characters are growing up as individuals, even as they grow apart as a group. Other reviewers have noted that O'Malley's story went much darker in this installment. But what makes this book so impressive is that it follows through on the experiences of its characters in a natural and logical fashion. Everything that happens to the characters in this chapter feels earned, and O'Malley has perfectly captured the messiness of growing up.

The bar has been set very high for the next and final book.

TV Viewing (2/15 - 2/21)

24: 4:00 - 5:00 pm

I haven't seen it yet, due to the President's speech throwing off my DVR. The Fox TV website wants to install some crappy media player on my system, so I'll probably have to wait to find a decent torrent of this episode.

House: The Softer Side

The medical mystery of the week involves a priest who's lost his faith. Naturally, he bonds with House over their mutual atheism. And Cuddy is being wishy-washy over whether to invite House to a Jewish naming ceremony. But there must always be an annoying subplot, and once again it involves Foreman and Thirteen. Dr. House apparently agrees with the viewers that the Foreman-Thirteen relationship sucks, as he tries to force them to break up. He rightly points out that being with Thirteen turns Foreman into an idiot willing to throw away his entire career.

As usual for this season, the episode is two-thirds decent, with some nice interaction between House and the patient. The Cuddy portions are a bit annoying, as she acts more immature and indecisive than usual, but the actors manage to bring out some genuine emotions from a shaky script. If you ignore the banal Foreman-Thirteen subplot, House remains one of the best procedurals on TV.

Battlestar Galactica: Deadlock

I'm a bit torn on this episode. There's some great character moments, especially for Baltar, and the acting is superb, as always. But the central conflict of the episode, whether the Cylons and humans can successfully blend their societies, is beaten like a dead horse that's then set on fire.

Adama is pissed that Galactica is being repaired with living Cylon goop. The Cylons want to take off and abandon the fleet. And the civilians are getting restless and angry because they're starving while Adama makes nice with the Cylons. Any one of these plot threads can lead to interesting drama, but this episode plays them all at once, necessitating a great deal of manufactured conflict and out-of-left-field behavior.

What ultimately saves this episode is the human drama involving Ellen (recently returned to the fleet), Tigh, and Caprica Six. There's a fascinating and tragic love triangle here, and Michael Hogan and Tricia Helfer act the hell out of every scene they're in. Only four episodes to go...

Monday, February 16, 2009

TV Review (2/8 - 2/14)

I simply couldn't find the time last week to watch much TV, so I didn't bother to do a write-up this weekend. Instead, I'm gonna write down short phrases that best encapsulate the two shows I did manage to watch.

24: 3:00 - 4:00 pm
Under the right circumstances, even baby torture is justified.
Being the First Gentleman of the United States sucks.

Battlestar Galactica: No Exit
In lieu of actually planning things out, simply dumping a lot of information on the viewers and calling it a revelation will suffice. If viewers start to complain, distract them with the "I'm a PC" guy.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Friday the 13th: This Review is Not a Remake

Friday the 13th (2009)
Director: Marcus Nispel (The Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake)
Producer: Michael Bay (he's very rich, because there is no God)
Writers: Hah!

Starring:
Jared Padelecki (on some show called Supernatural)
Derek Mears (this dude is scary-looking without the hockey mask)
And bunch of "actors" picked out of an Abercrombie and Fitch catalog

Marcus Nispel is a director of limited ability. I suppose he's directed enough commercials and music videos so that he understands the basics of filmmaking. What he lacks is any real vision or ambition to do anything beyond delivering a competent entertainment product on time. His limitations were readily apparent in the 2003 remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. The original was as much dark satire as it was horror, and its grainy film school quality gave it the illusion of authenticity. Nispel's remake was a slick, thoughtless mess that failed to capture anything that made the original film so memorable.

So it comes as a pleasant surprise that the remake of Friday the 13th is really good. Now don't get me wrong: it isn't actually good. It's dumb, and sleazy, and completely dependent on the conventions which drive the slasher genre. What makes it so good is that it's unapologetically dumb, and sleazy, and revels in the conventions of the slasher genre. Nispel is a director who prefers making cookie-cutter films, and Friday the 13th is the granddaddy of cookie-cutter slasher films. It's a match made in heaven, if heaven were filled with death, tits, and pot.

I'm going to spoil the entire movie for you:
Teenagers come to Crystal Lake to smoke pot and have sex. Jason kills them. 6 months later ... another group of teenagers comes to Crystal Lake. Jason kills them.

Actually, there's a tiny bit more going on, but Nispel wisely doesn't waste much time on backstory. The opening 5 minutes essentially recap the events of the original Friday the 13th, where the killer turned out to be (spoiler alert!) Jason's mother. Jason was a deformed, retarded child who apparently drowned at Camp Crystal Lake in 1980. Mom went berserk and started killing the camp counselors, but she got decapitated by the Final Girl. Jason, who apparently hadn't drowned and was living in the woods as a wild child (why not?), witnessed his mother's death and vowed vengeance on all sexy co-eds.

Skipping ahead to the present, a bunch of teens wander into the woods surrounding Crystal Lake looking for their secret marijuana field. The original Friday the 13th had a rather conservative morality that punished teens for drug use and sexual promiscuity. The remake is clearly self-aware enough to toy with the nonsensical connection between weed, sex, and death, but it never makes the vain attempt to rise above its source material. After Jason does his thing, the film jumps ahead 6 months, and another group of teens heads up to a lake cabin for some good clean fun, which includes topless wakeboarding. This group is also slightly more diverse, as it includes the Token Black and the Token Asian (spoiler: of course they both die horribly). At the same time, Jared Padelecki is driving around Crystal Lake looking for his missing sister, who was part of the first set of ill-fated teens.

A major part of producing a decent slasher flick is finding the right balance between sympathetic victims and thrilling kills. If the victims are too sympathetic, then the movie starts to feel unpleasant, or worse, so much focus on the cannon fodder makes the movie dull. But if the victims aren't sympathetic at all, then the movie can't deliver any of the cheap thrills that the audience expects. By sticking closely to formula, Nispel and company avoid the extremes. The teens are all stock characters, so it's easy to tell who to root for: there's the preppy jerk, the cool slacker, the stoner, the slut, the good girl. The characters are amusing enough, but they're never so sympathetic that you don't want to see how Jason offs them.

And Jason does off them in some creative ways. While the machete remains the weapon of choice, Jason also uses axes, screw drivers, fire pokers, bow and arrows, bear traps, wall-mounted antlers, and death-by-campfire.

Halfway into the final act, it became clear that Friday the 13th is not so much a horror film as a sadistic comedy. The audience I went to see it with laughed and cheered more often than the audiences I was with when I saw Iron Man and The Dark Knight. Far more than any mere superhero, Jason truly is the ultimate empowerment fantasy. Stripped of any pretense of morality, Jason gets to indulge his most violent impulses, and the audience gets to indulge in vicarious sadism. As creepy as it is to say, there's some part of our (or at least my) primordial ape brain that finds this violent fantasy to be a lot more entertaining than entitled billionaires pontificating about social responsibility.

On one last note, having blogged about Doomsday recently, here's another movie where the lasting influence of 28 Days Later is evident. That film threw out the hoary, old convention of the shuffling zombie and introduced the fast zombie. In the original Friday the 13th franchise, Jason may not have been a zombie (at first), but he always managed to catch his victims despite never moving faster than a brisk walk. Remake Jason runs after people like Usain Bolt with a machete. With a hulk like Derek Mears behind the mask, the visual is startlingly effective.